Solo Parenting Abroad: Consent Letters, Childcare and What It's Really Like

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Can you really travel or live abroad with your kids on your own? It’s one of the most common questions in our community, and one of the least honestly answered.

I’ll be upfront. I’m not a single parent. Marty and I travel with our boys, Louie (9) and Leo (2).

But I know what doing it alone feels like. When Louie was nine months old, I flew from the Netherlands to Australia with him and spent six weeks in Brisbane without Marty. And here in Vietnam, Marty works full-time, so most days it’s just me and the boys. 🌏

This guide mixes what I’ve lived with careful research. The legal, safety and childcare sections link to official sources, because rules differ for every family and every passport.

Six Weeks Alone in Brisbane with a Baby

Louie had just started crawling when we landed in Brisbane. Overnight, every place we stayed turned into a list of hazards.

None of it was baby-proofed. Low power points, sharp table corners, steps, cords within reach. Before I could put him down in a new room, I’d be on my hands and knees checking it first.

Physically, it was a lot. A baby is heavy when you’re the only one carrying him, and I’d only brought a carrier. (Our flying with a toddler story covers how that trip started, including a take-off moment I won’t forget.)

The hardest part, though, was the end of each day. Louie would finally fall asleep and there was no one to share it with. No one to laugh with about something he’d done, or to say “I’m done” to. The good bits and the worries all stayed with me.

I carried a signed consent letter from Marty the whole six weeks. Nobody asked to see it. I’d still take one every single time, because the day someone does ask is the day it really matters.

Louie also got a nasty ear infection on that trip, and it changed how we think about cover. That story is in our health insurance guide.

What It Looks Like Now

In Vietnam, Marty works full-time, so I have Louie and Leo by myself most days. That means schoolwork with Louie, keeping a two-year-old busy, meals and outings, with my own work squeezed around the edges.

It isn’t the same as being a single parent. Marty is home in the evenings, and we share the income and the big decisions. But I know the long stretch of a day as the only adult on duty, in a country where I don’t speak the language. That’s the lens for everything below.

Our daily routine lives in full on Homeschooling on the Move, if you’d like to see how a typical day runs.

Who This Guide Is For

Solo parenting abroad doesn’t look the same for every family. For some, it’s a single parent raising kids independently while working remotely. For others, one parent travels with the kids for weeks or months while the other stays home for work.

It can also mean co-parenting across borders, with children splitting time between parents in two countries. Or, like us, it can mean long days as the only adult on duty while your partner works.

Each version comes with its own paperwork, money pressures and support needs. Most family travel guides assume two adults sharing the load, so this page focuses on what changes when it’s mostly you.

What It’s Really Like

The logistics fall on you. There’s no one to hand over to when you’re exhausted, and decision fatigue builds quickly.

The hard moments also tend to arrive together: a child with a fever, a work deadline and nobody to take the next shift. Knowing that before you go means you can plan for it instead of being caught out.

There are good parts too. Many solo parents talk about how close they grow with their kids, and how independent the kids become. Go in with your eyes open: the closeness and the tiredness are both real.

Consent, Custody and the Law

This is the section to get right before anything else. The rules come from your home country’s laws and any court orders you have, so what applies depends on where you and your children are from. It applies even if you’re not separated.

What the Hague Convention Does (and Doesn’t Do)

The 1980 Hague Child Abduction Convention helps return a child who has been wrongfully taken or kept abroad. It’s a civil process between governments, not a criminal law.

The HCCH status table lists more than 100 member countries, including Australia, the Netherlands and Thailand. Vietnam is not a member. If a dispute ever arises in a non-member country, getting a child home is usually much harder.

Criminal Penalties Come from National Law

In Australia, taking a child overseas while a travel-limiting order is in place, or while parenting proceedings are pending, is a criminal offence. The Australian Federal Police explains the rules and penalties.

Other countries have their own laws. If you’re separated or co-parenting, check yours with a family lawyer before planning long-term travel.

Carry a Consent Letter, Even If You’re Together

The Netherlands shows how routine these checks are. The Dutch government’s consent form is recommended any time one parent travels alone with a child, and there’s an English version for foreign border officers.

Include:

• both parents’ names and contact details, plus a passport copy of the parent who isn’t travelling
• your child’s full name, date of birth and passport number
• travel dates and destinations
• the absent parent’s signature

Keep the original in your document folder and a copy in the cloud.

Other Situations

• Sole custody: carry a certified copy of your court order.
• The other parent has died: carry a certified copy of the death certificate.
• The other parent won’t consent: don’t travel. Speak to a family lawyer about a court order first.

Destination Rules Change Too

South Africa once required consent letters for all visiting children, but has since dropped this for most foreign children travelling with a parent. South African children still need them. Always check with the embassy of the country you’re heading to.

Our Strong Recommendation

If you’re separated or co-parenting and planning long-term travel, talk to a family lawyer before you commit. They can check whether your custody arrangement allows extended travel, and help you get formal consent or a court order if needed.

An hour of legal advice costs far less than getting this wrong.

What to Keep With You

Pack a waterproof folder, with digital copies in secure cloud storage:

• consent letter or court custody order
• each child’s birth certificate (original or certified copy)
• a copy of the other parent’s passport or ID, where relevant
• medical records, vaccinations and prescriptions
• your own passport and visas
• insurance policy number and emergency contact

Health Cover When You’re the Only Adult

When you’re the sole carer, a hospital stay isn’t just a medical problem. It’s a childcare problem too. Someone has to look after your kids while you’re being treated, and that’s worth thinking through before you leave.

Home public health cover usually doesn’t follow you. Australia’s Medicare, for example, doesn’t cover you overseas. Our health insurance guide explains the options in detail.

What to Check in a Policy

• Children named on the policy: confirm your dependants are actually included.
• Evacuation and repatriation: transport to a suitable hospital, or home.
• Outpatient and paediatric care: not just emergency hospital stays.
• Help if you’re hospitalised: some policies contribute to travel costs for a relative to come and care for your kids. Check whether yours does.
• Mental health cover: for you as much as for them.
• Pre-existing conditions: declare everything, and read the exclusions.
• A 24/7 helpline in a language you speak.

Providers to Compare

• SafetyWing: flexible monthly nomad cover you can buy while you’re already abroad. It’s the one we’re leaning towards (affiliate link).
• Cigna Global: international health insurance with several plan levels, quote-based.
• IMG Global: international medical plans, including family options.
• Genki: nomad-focused cover. Check whether you can sign up from where you are.
• Allianz Care: international health plans for families.

Prices and cover change often, so get current quotes and read the full policy wording before you buy.

💛 Our Pick for Getting Started

SafetyWing is genuinely where we started, and it’s still what we recommend to families just stepping into this lifestyle. No annual contracts, no huge upfront cost, cancel anytime it doesn’t suit. It’s not the most comprehensive option on this list, but it’s the easiest way to get real cover in place before you overthink it.

Get Covered with SafetyWing

Before You Go

Six to Eight Weeks Before

• See a GP or travel clinic about vaccinations for your destinations. Some courses take weeks, so book early. Our travel vaccinations guide covers what to ask.
• Get dental check-ups done at home. A toothache abroad is much harder when you’re also minding the kids.
• Stock up on regular prescriptions, with a buffer.
• Carry a doctor’s letter for prescribed medicines. Some ADHD medications are restricted or banned in certain countries, so check each destination’s rules first.

Two to Four Weeks Before

• Get your consent letter or custody documents signed, with the dates and destinations of this trip.
• Set up a multi-currency account and a backup card. We explain how we manage money across borders, and why we switched to Wise.
• Look up the nearest hospital with English-speaking staff at your first stop.
• Share your plans with someone at home who could help in an emergency.

Packing When You’re the Only Adult

Pack for the moments when you’ll have one free hand, at best.

• A compact pram as well as a carrier: I only took a carrier to Brisbane with Louie, and my body felt it by the end. On our next long trip we brought a travel pram.
• A small first-aid kit: children’s paracetamol and ibuprofen, rehydration sachets, plasters and a thermometer.
• Socket covers and corner guards: cheap, light and useful for crawlers. Rentals are rarely baby-proofed, as I found in Brisbane.
• Headphones and a charged tablet: your backup for long waits and work calls.
• A comfort item: a favourite toy or pillowcase helps kids settle in new places.
• Packing cubes: so you can find things one-handed.

Childcare as a Solo Parent

When you’re the only adult, childcare is how the work gets done. It’s worth sorting before you arrive, not after your first missed deadline.

Local Nannies and Babysitters

In many places, a local nanny is the most practical daily option. Ask other parents and local expat groups for recommendations, meet in person first, check references and start with a short trial.

Au Pairs: Check the Rules First

An au pair lives with you and helps with childcare in exchange for board and pocket money. For solo parents, another adult in the home can make a big difference.

The catch is legal. Au pairs usually need a visa or permit in the country you’re living in, and many visa-free or tourist stays don’t allow it. Check the host country’s rules before you advertise on a platform like AuPairWorld.

Family Communities and Co-Living

Staying near other families changes a lot for solo parents. Kids have playmates, you have adults to talk to, and informal help grows naturally. Our worldschooling hubs directory lists more than 430 hubs and communities.

Childcare Swaps

Once you trust another family, swapping mornings works well. You take all the kids on Tuesday, they take them on Thursday. Everyone gets focused work time, and the kids get company.

Classes and Drop-In Care

Many nomad hubs have playgroups, activity classes and drop-in daycare. Ask in local Facebook and Telegram groups before you arrive, so you can book ahead.

Where to Look

• Babysits: babysitter listings, mostly across Europe.
• Care.com: nannies, sitters and tutors. Check it covers your destination.
• Local parent and expat Facebook groups: often the best source of trusted recommendations.

Read more in our education and childcare guide.

Accommodation for Solo Parents

When you’re parenting alone, where you stay decides how smoothly each day runs. I learnt that fast in Brisbane, where none of our rentals were set up for a baby who’d just started crawling.

Look for:

• A proper kitchen: cooking at home saves money and gives kids routine.
• A washing machine: with kids and no second adult, laundry matters more than you’d expect.
• Child safety: ask about stairs, balconies, pools and power points before you book, and request photos.
• Fast Wi-Fi: ask for a speed test screenshot before you commit. Our internet guide covers SIMs and backup plans.
• A walkable neighbourhood: somewhere you feel comfortable out alone with kids, day or evening.
• Other families nearby: family-friendly buildings and co-living spaces add a natural support layer.

Working Solo with Kids Around

Your work pays for everything, so it needs protecting. When you’re the only adult, every work hour has to be planned.

Here in Vietnam, my work fits around the boys rather than the other way round. That’s normal for solo parents, and it’s worth being honest with yourself about how many real working hours you’ll have.

A Rhythm That Works for Many Families

• Morning: learning, independent play or childcare while you do focused work.
• Midday: time together outside, with markets, parks and meals.
• Afternoon: nap-time work for little ones, or a class or activity for older kids.
• Evening: dinner and bedtime, then a short catch-up if you need it.

Tools That Help

• Trello or Asana: keeps tasks visible when your brain is split.
• Slack or Teams: async messages reduce the pressure to reply instantly.
• Toggl or Clockify: shows where your limited hours actually go.
• Loom: record video updates while the kids sleep.

Short focused sprints suit parenting well. The Pomodoro method (25 minutes of work, then a short break) gives you a natural moment to check in with your kids.

Be Honest with Clients

Share your time zone and core hours, and let clients know you’re working around children. Most people respond better than you’d expect when they understand the situation.

More in our remote work guide for families.

Living on One Income

Solo parents carry the whole budget. One income covers everything, and there’s no second earner to fall back on if work goes quiet.

A Bigger Emergency Fund

We’d suggest a larger buffer than a two-income family might need, especially if your income varies. Money guides often suggest three to six months of expenses. As a solo earner, the higher end makes sense.

Higher Costs per Adult

Rent and transport don’t halve because there’s one adult. Factor that into where you base yourself. Our cost comparison of 50+ destinations is a useful starting point.

Childcare Is a Fixed Cost

Budget for it like rent, not as an optional extra. It’s what makes your working hours possible.

More Than One Income Stream

A second client or income source matters more when you’re the only earner. One quiet month hits much harder.

Don’t Forget Retirement

With everything else on your plate, retirement savings slip easily. Small regular contributions still add up over time.

See how we manage money across borders and our guide to what it really costs to live abroad with kids.

Education on the Move

For solo parents, education has to fit around work, especially on days without childcare. That often means approaches kids can partly run themselves.

Homeschooling: a structured curriculum you guide. Good if you want clear records for a return to school.

Worldschooling: learning through travel, culture and daily life. Easier to combine with work, because it doesn’t rely on set lessons.

Unschooling: child-led, curiosity-driven learning. It needs trust in the process more than teaching time.

Online schools: teacher-supported programmes kids work through fairly independently. UK-based options include Cambridge Home School and Wolsey Hall Oxford. Some US programmes only accept US residents, so check eligibility first. Our guide to online programs compares more options.

Before you choose, check your home country’s education rules. Some countries require registration or attendance even when you travel. Our worldschooling legal guide covers the rules country by country.

Platforms for Independent Learning

• Khan Academy: free and self-paced.
• Outschool: paid live online classes with real teachers.
• IXL: maths and English practice, by subscription.
• Duolingo: game-style language learning.

Friends and Social Time

• Local sports, swimming, art or dance classes.
• Homeschool and worldschool meetups through Facebook and Telegram groups.
• Online clubs and classes. We share what’s worked for us in helping travelling kids make friends.

More on worldschooling and socialisation and in our education and childcare guide.

Looking After Yourself

Parenting solo while working and travelling is a lot. Burnout isn’t a failure. It’s a sign that something in your setup needs to change.

In Brisbane, it wasn’t the physical tiredness that got to me most. It was having no one to share the day with once Louie was asleep. Plan for that part too.

What Helps

• Stay longer: six to eight weeks or more in one place cuts down planning, packing and goodbyes. More in our slow travel guide.
• Book help early: a regular sitter isn’t a luxury. It’s what makes the work sustainable.
• Protect small rests: a solo coffee, a class, or a quiet hour after bedtime.
• Set a finish time for work: without another adult to call it, work spreads into every evening.
• Review your pace: what felt exciting at month two may be too much by month six. Slowing down is allowed.

Signs You Need to Slow Down

• Ongoing irritability or flatness
• Dreading things you used to enjoy
• Working later without getting more done
• Kids acting out more than usual (they feel the pressure too)

Support for You

Someone to talk to at the end of the day: schedule regular calls with family or close friends, at a time that works across both time zones. Evenings are often when solo parents feel most alone.

Online therapy: services such as BetterHelp can help during hard stretches. Availability and therapist licensing vary by country, so check a service works where you are.

Other solo parents: they understand your days in a way other families can’t. Look in local parent groups, worldschooling hubs and our own community.

Small daily anchors: a morning walk, journalling or a cuppa on the balcony after bedtime. Small routines matter when everything else keeps moving.

Helping Your Kids Settle

Change is the backdrop of a travelling childhood. Many kids adapt faster than their parents expect, but they still need help making sense of it.

Keep some rituals the same: bedtime, morning routines, a favourite meal in every new kitchen. The things that don’t change make everything else feel safer.

Give them outlets: drawing, journalling, play and stories help kids work through big changes.

Give them choices: let them pick between two places to stay, pack their own bag or choose tomorrow’s outing.

Check in daily: “What was the best part of today? What was hardest?” Short and regular works best.

Signs a Child May Need More Support

• Sleep problems that don’t settle within a couple of weeks in a new place
• Going back to behaviour they’d outgrown, and staying there
• Strong, lasting resistance to moving or to new places
• Missing home or friends with real urgency, not just sadness

These are signals to slow down, get support and, if needed, talk to a professional. They don’t mean the lifestyle has failed. They mean your child needs something specific right now.

Culture and Language

As a solo parent, you shape how your kids meet each new place, and curiosity is contagious.

• Visit markets, museums and local festivals, even just to watch.
• Cook local dishes from market ingredients together.
• Learn a handful of local phrases. Kids love showing off new words.
• Use Duolingo for daily practice and Google Translate for real-life moments, or book a weekly local tutor.
• Keep a travel journal together, even if it’s just drawings and ticket stubs.

Getting Around and Staying Safe

Getting Around Without a Co-Pilot

• Public transport: check for lifts and step-free stations near your accommodation. Many cities offer free or cheaper fares for young kids.
• Ride-hailing apps: Grab in Southeast Asia, Bolt in parts of Europe and Africa, plus Uber. Car seats aren’t reliably available, so check before you book.
• Car seat laws: they vary widely, and some countries exempt taxis. A lightweight travel booster can be worth carrying for older kids.
• A foldable pram: worth the space for airports, uneven footpaths and long transit days.
• Monthly passes: on longer stays, they save money and daily hassle.

Our travel apps guide lists useful apps for getting around.

Build Your Safety Net

Solo doesn’t have to mean alone. Your strongest safety net is people who know where you are and can help.

Share your plans: give someone at home a rough itinerary, and update it when things change.

Subscribe to government alerts: Australians can subscribe to destination updates on Smartraveller (pre-trip registration ended in 2019). Americans can enrol in STEP. Dutch citizens can follow the Ministry of Foreign Affairs travel advice.

Keep digital copies: passports, insurance, custody documents and medical records in secure cloud storage, with access for one trusted person at home.

Prepare kids for getting separated: in each new place, agree on what to do, such as finding a shopkeeper or another parent with children. A small card with your phone number helps younger kids.

Communities Worth Joining

• Worldly Tribe Facebook group: our community of travelling families.
• Solo parent and digital nomad family groups on Facebook.
• Local destination Facebook and Telegram groups for on-the-ground advice.

More in our guide to building community as a travelling family.

Documents and Visas

When you manage all the paperwork alone, a simple system saves a lot of stress.

Your Document System

• A waterproof folder: consent letter or custody order, birth certificates, passports and insurance details.
• Secure cloud storage: copies you can reach from any device.
• A password manager: such as 1Password or Bitwarden.

Visa Basics for Solo Families

• Schengen Area: many non-EU passport holders can stay 90 days in any 180-day period across all Schengen countries. Portugal and Spain are in Schengen. Georgia, Albania and the UK are not, which is why some families spend time there between Schengen stays. EU citizens, like our family, aren’t limited by this rule.
• Thailand: the Destination Thailand Visa (DTV) includes spouses and dependent children, but Thai visa rules have changed often. See our Thailand visa guide.
• Mexico and Colombia: popular for long stays, but how long you can stay depends on your passport and current immigration rules. Check official sources before booking.

Always check the official immigration website or embassy of each country, plus your own government’s travel advice. Rules change quickly, and permission to enter doesn’t automatically mean permission to work.

Our guides to digital nomad visas for families and staying longer without a nomad visa explain the options.

FAQs About Solo Parenting Abroad

Do I need a consent letter if I’m married and just travelling without my partner?

Often, yes. Many countries, including the Netherlands, recommend one any time a child travels without both parents. It costs nothing and can save you a missed flight.

Can I take my kids abroad if my ex won’t agree?

Not without a court order. Travelling anyway can have serious legal consequences in many countries. Speak to a family lawyer in your home country first.

What documents should a solo parent carry?

A consent letter or custody order, each child’s birth certificate, passports, insurance details and medical records. Keep originals in a waterproof folder and copies in secure cloud storage.

Is it safe to travel as a solo mum with kids?

It depends heavily on the destination and neighbourhood. Research areas before booking, share your plans with someone at home, and subscribe to your government’s travel alerts (Smartraveller for Australians, STEP for Americans).

How do solo parents work remotely with young kids?

Usually with a mix of paid childcare, nap-time work blocks, childcare swaps with other families and some late nights. Expect fewer productive hours than you’d like, and plan your income around that.

Can I hire an au pair while we travel?

Sometimes, but it’s not simple. Au pairs usually need a visa or permit in the country you’re living in, and many visa-free stays don’t allow it. Check the rules before you advertise.

Where’s the best place to start as a solo parent?

There’s no single answer. Look for an existing family community, affordable and trusted childcare, good paediatric healthcare and simple daily logistics. Our cost comparison of 50+ destinations is a good place to start.

Our Takeaways

Six weeks alone in Brisbane with a crawling baby taught me two things. You can manage far more on your own than you think. And you shouldn’t have to carry all of it alone.

If you’re doing this solo, build your support before you need it: a consent letter in your folder, a few people you can message at 9pm, a place set up for small children, and childcare you trust. None of it makes the evenings less quiet, but it makes the days much more doable.

And if you’re a solo parent already out there, we’d love to hear how you make it work. Come and say hi in the Worldly Tribe Facebook group. 💛

Keep reading: how to become a digital nomad family, staying healthy on the road and real family budgets abroad.